Funny things that happen in restaurants

I am sure the following stories could have happened anywhere, so please don’t think I’m being anti-American, but really, they are priceless.

First, we took our son, who has never been to Florida before, to stay in our villa. He has not really any idea how the two similar languages differ. We wanted a light snack and he suggested Burger King.

In we walked, full of anticipation, to be very slowly greeted by a server who lumbered up to us at a snails pace and just looked at us with her hand poised on the till ready to take our order. Our son said, “I would like the breakfast please” answer, “Do you want biscuits with that? ” Not understanding the concept of biscuits with breakfast, he looked to us and we explained that they were like savoury scones. “Oh, right”, he said. “Yes please, I’ll have it with biscuits”.

The server then lumbered back to the kitchen area and spoke to a person on the other side in the kitchen. She then lumbered all the way back to us and said, “We don’t got no biscuits”.

“Ok” said our son, “I’ll have it without then”.

“Without what”?

“Without biscuits”.

“OK”.

So off she goes again, back to the kitchen area, talks to the person in the kitchen and comes back and says, “OK, we can do it without biscuits”. All this is being said by the server in the strongest Deep South drawl we had ever heard.

By this time we were all trying so hard to keep straight faces, but eventually we all got fed.

Second incident happened, again in a restaurant, McDonalds this time. The bill for a takeaway breakfast came to $8. 20. Not wanting a pocket full of change my husband handed over a $10 bill and 20 cents in change.

“You’ve given me too much sir”, he said.

My husband said, “If you now give me 2 $1 bills then that will be right”.

“No sir” he said, “Then I will have given you too much”

At this point we had lost the will to live so we took back the 20 cents and let him give us 80 cents in loose change, but at least he was no longer confused.

Third came in a restaurant where I had had pink lemonade and thought it was rather nice. So, the next time we went to this restaurant, I asked for pink lemonade. The server said, she was sorry but they didn’t do pink lemonade. So I looked at the drinks section of the menu and said I would try the strawberry lemonade. And what came out? You’ve guessed it – pink lemonade!

Oh the joys of dining out!