ARGGGHHHH!

[Doll123]

Hey all, sorry to do this to you but i want some opinions on this subject.
its a long story but here goes........
We travel to florida every 2 years with the same family, we have found a villa that we love so return there every 2 years, now its about that time when i start hunting for flights, car hire ect for our next trip (Nov 09) we always go in november as we find the weather managable and the parks quiet.

When we went in 2005, we decided to go for 3 weeks instead of 2, so we could relax more as well as fitting in all the parks and shopping. The family we go with have 2 children current ages 8 and 5. Before there has been no problem in taking both children out of school for 3 weeks.

Now i have given them the rough dates for next year and they have turned round and said that they don't want to take the children out of school for 3 weeks at that time, but if we went a week later it wouldn't matter.

This is what is annoying me cause we have told them that we will go for three weeks no matter what, but it's fine if they just want to come for 2, they can meet us out there. But they keep saying, "well if it was a week later" it may look like we are being unreasonable by not going a week later, only the reason is that it takes our middle week into thanksgiving week, and we all know how crazy that can get.

But what i cant work out is, WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE WHEN YOU TAKE YOUR CHILDREN OUT OF SCHOOL!!!!!!

Thanks for being a pair of ears hope i haven't bored you all.

Katie

[christhear]

Are you sure they dont mean a week earlier - as half term is normally the last week in October, this would make sense as they would only miss 2 weeks of school.
Also I don't think you are being unreasonable, you have still offered to share the cost of the accomodation for the 2 weeks that they come for.
Alternatively they could spend 2 weeks with you (your 2nd and 3rd week) and then have a third week on their own.

[steph_goodrum]

Not sure I quite follow, if taking it a week later makes your middle week Thanksgiving week then as it is does it not mean your last week is already Thanksgiving week?

At least if you go for Thanksgiving you get to take advantage of all the great sales.

At the end of the day no matter how well you get on if you dont get a date that suits you both it will be better to do as suggested and overlap by a couple of weeks than to have any resentment before youu go as it woun;t take much to make it surface and could potentially spoil the holiday and the friendship which it isn't worth doing.

[Albert the Frog]

I've been in a similar position with some friends of ours and the "issue" was bubbling under the surface despite our/their addressing of it. If you value your friendship i'd bite my tongue-particularly as it is to do with their kids-going to orlando at any time is great.I'd rather go and enjoy my time with my friends.

[Susan J]

You need to discuss WHY and when you understand -for instance " I have no problem changing, but what difference does it make for you?" Then they explain and you all feel better

BTW if you go forward a week, to end of October you will have all tha Halloween fun also!

[orlandodaze]

Stick to your original plan and let them come out one week later . that way you are doing it your way and they are doing it their way . everyone is happy and your friendship stays intact .

[LiesaAnna]

i agree with Olive we loved 3 weeks but to be honest only wanted to sunbath the last week as i felt drained shopping etc.... so they would get a new zest of energy by the time your friends would get there asnd be raring to go once again xx good luck whatever you decide xx stay friends life is to short xx

[Tonish]

The ages of children make a difference when it comes to taking them out of school. Whilst it's fine when they're 4 or 5 years old, things change when they get to 8ish; every week makes a difference in their performance and they can quickly get left behind.

It may seem like nonsense to you, which I understand - if you've agreed to take them out of school, what difference does the date make? Well, I assume they're going through something of this type of thought process:

1. I can't possibly take young Jimmy out for 3 weeks at his age, he's just got on top of his homework and it's been a struggle all year, he'll not catch up again.
2. What will the school think? Got a stroppy note the last time I took them out, they will never agree to 3 weeks, and they'll be cross enough at 2.
3. If it's nearer to December/Christmas it won't matter so much as they're winding down then and lots of people will be doing it.
4. We really want to go. Let's try to get it as near the end of term as possible, so he doesn't miss too much.
5. Oh God, this is really complicated, it was so much easier when they were just toddlers.

Things just change when you've got kids of school age, I'm afraid. I assume you don't, or you wouldn't be asking the question, but I promise you, the priorities are just so massively altered that a simple thing like a week earlier or later does make a fundamental difference.

We've got 4 of them and been through this many times. Can I politely and gently point out that they will probably see your problem with the thanksgiving week as a tiny one, heavily outweighed by the school absence thing.

[Kazzie]

A lot of schools now only allow 2 weeks of absense per year for holidays outside of their normal allowance. It does depend on the particular authority that the school comes under. I know that the local authority our schools come under we have to ask permission first before booking any flights etc. and they are not very keen at all on allowing absence. They certainly would not allow it regularly each year unless it was really special circumstances. I do know of parents that have taken their children out without permission and have paid a fine for doing so.

[Andy & Arlene]

Personally I think 3 weeks continuous absence (for a holiday) out of shcool during a school term is a long time to miss. It is perhaps for this reason that the other party want to change dates. I think you should have a chat with them to establish the real reason. Hope it all works out for you all and you get your dates sorted out. [msnsmile2]