1. Man walks into the bedroom with a sheep under his arm while his wife is lying in bed reading.
Man says: "This is the pig I have s*x with when you've got a headache."
Wife replies: "I think you'll find, that is a sheep."
Man replies: "I think you'll find I was talking to the sheep."
2. A man walks into his bedroom and sees his wife packing a suitcase. He Asks, "What are you doing?"
She answers, "I'm moving to Sydney. I heard prostitutes there get paid $400 for doing what I do for you for free."
Later that night, on her way out, the wife walks into the bedroom and sees her husband packing his suitcase. When she asks him where he's going, he replies, "I'm coming too I want to see how you live on $800 a year".
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