>Douglas the humble Crab and Kate the Lobster Princess were madly,
>deeply
>and passionately in love.
>
>
>For months they enjoyed an idyllic relationship until one day Kate
>scuttled over to Douglas in tears.
>
>
>We can't see each other any more...' she sobbed.
>
>Why?' gasped Douglas.
>
>'Daddy says that crabs are too common,' she wailed. 'He claims you
>are a
>mere crab, and a poor one at that, and crabs are the lowest
>class of crustacean and that no daughter of his will marry someone
>who
>can only walk sideways.'
>
>
>Douglas was shattered, and scuttled sidewards away into the darkness
>to
>drink himself into a filthy state of aquatic oblivion.
>
>
>That night, the great Lobster ball was taking place. Lobsters came
>from
>far and wide, dancing and merry making, but the lobster Princess
>refused
>to join in, choosing instead to sit by her father's side,
>inconsolable.
>
>
>Suddenly the doors burst open, and Douglas the crab strode in. The
>lobsters all stopped their dancing, the Princess gasped and the King
>Lobster rose from his throne. Slowly, painstakingly, Douglas the
>crab
>made his way across the floor.......and all could see that he was
>walking, not sideways............but FORWARDS.........Yes FORWARDS,
>one
>claw after another!!
>
>
>Step by step he made his approach towards the throne, until he
>looked
>the King lobster in the eye.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>There was a deadly hush..................................
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>For quite a while...........................
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>Finally, the crab spoke.......
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>'F*#@, I'm drunk.'
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