Two blokes are sitting in the pub and one is getting really depressed about the fact that his wife has left him.

He keeps insisting he's useless but after a few pints his mate has convinced him he's better off without her

Then all of a sudden the dumped bloke bursts into tears
"i dont even know what button to press on the washing machine" he sobs

Oh thats simple says the other bloke "What does it say on your shirt?"

"ARSENAL" says the dumped bloke[msneek]