OV Slimming Club

[Macka]

<blockquote id="quote" class="ffs">quote:Originally posted by LiesaAnna
i think after 25 years of marriage and 2 extra years of being together is very difficult for some of the family to grasp, so used to me being there, hes not that happy bout me losing too much weight either, think hes feeling very insecure

i want 2 littles holidays a year and some self importance!! i wanna be wanted for me not someones wife or mother!
i want nice things in life, not that i dont have them, just want some different things now, still want my husband cos i love him!![msnwink]
[/quote]

Hey now Leisa, ok the opportuntiy may have passed you by this time, but I think you need to put yourself first here, for everyone's sake. Your family will want a mum and wife who is happy, they may just not realise the importance of that yet. Of course your hubby feels insecure, he's used to and comfortable with the way you are, who knows what he's imagined happening when you "change" I think you have to find a way of letting them all know that you are about to metamorphose into a butterfly, but that you won't fly away and it won't change how much you love them.

Sorry Leisa how arrogant of me to say that, but I have seen this before. It's in no-ones interest for you to be unhappy.

<blockquote id="quote" class="ffs">quote:Originally posted by LiesaAnna
i think after 25 years of marriage and 2 extra years of being together is very difficult for some of the family to grasp, so used to me being there, hes not that happy bout me losing too much weight either, think hes feeling very insecure

i want 2 littles holidays a year and some self importance!! i wanna be wanted for me not someones wife or mother!
i want nice things in life, not that i dont have them, just want some different things now, still want my husband cos i love him!![msnwink]
[/quote]

Liesa, In my view it is all about give and take, Steve can be insecure by all means but does he not understand that you will be around longer because you will be more healthy!!!

Also it will give you more self worth if you can get out and earn a few extra pennies[msnwink]

You can have both your little job and your husband why should it be either or?? That's just not very fair[msnsad]

Steve could at least let you do it for a trail period and if it does not work out you can always leave but it seems daft not to give it a go??

[grouphug][grouphug][grouphug]

[fiona]

I agree with everything Macka and Julie said. See if you can come to a compromise on the working front, it will give you some well deserved self-esteem and (equally importantly) some independent money - even if you do save it for the holidays!

I used to work (apart from own self-satisfaction) to pay for holidays, then it became school fees and now it's the villa / holidays!

I agree everyone has issues when you start losing weight, but your health is the most important thing, and I am sure the whole family want you around forever, and the best way to ensure that is to be fit & healthy and slimmer!

A happy you = happy family.[grouphug] Chin up, see if you can keep the option open at the nursing home - they will probably understand the conflict when you have been a stay-at-home mum for a long time, and will want to be supportive. Happy employee = happy employer!!

[LiesaAnna]

Thanks all for your support, i dont know maybe i am overacting? but i feel terrible i have joint pain and a cold i think (dont normally have them) so maybe feeling too low, i feel very sick as well, but i was looking at fulltime work, i am so cheesed off with leg pain and sitting staring at these four walls doesnt help!
and as for the dam dog and the whining it gets me down!!
i called the careline people and explained , the lady was very understanding, said to take some time and call them back when i am ready, they will wait, so am very pleased about that, think i am going to just have to stand up to hubby!![}]
thanks again!! xx[grouphug]

[Sally D]

How about going for a part time job, keep everyone happy[msnsmile2]

<blockquote id="quote" class="ffs">quote:Originally posted by Sally D
How about going for a part time job, keep everyone happy[msnsmile2]
[/quote]

I think part-time fits in really really well with being a wife and Mummy, try just doing school hours, that's what I do in my offical job[msnwink] Running the family business is 24/7!![msneek]

[melvazquez]

So many wise words spoken.

Thinking of you Liesa.

mel

[LiesaAnna]

Thanks all[grouphug] think i may have blown this up with not feeling so good! will give him a good talking to tonight, and maybe we can reach some sort of happy medium

i would rather work full time with coming up to christmas extra pennies and all that!!
i dont know, i will have to think about this!![grouphug]

[mizzy]

Liesa

[grouphug]

cant you tell him that you think it will make you happy and you at least want to have a try

focus on something he likes say snooker or the pub and ask him to think how he would feel if you ever prevented him from doing the things he likes to do

if this fails you could try the "ways to a mans heart approach" and cook him big steak with a nice cold beer etc;

and if all else fails you could use you feminie charms[msnwink]


hope it all gets sorted out for you

dont be sad[grouphug] Mizzy

[LiesaAnna]

thanks Mizzy,
unfortunately or fortunately he doesnt do pubs/snooker, only his motorbike rides, he loves his bike and i dont mind in the slightest as he works hard enough, i share the enthusiasm with him, etc

he most of the time makes me happy, so no problems there, i think he feels its all a bit sudden!! i always said when Terri my 16 almost 17 next week left school i would like to get a job, i guess he didnt think i meant it, in his defence i will just say, i was chatting to someone on the monday about what i would like to do, looked on the internet and found a job!! no hanging around once my mind is made up!!! and went for it, so i suppose he didnt have time to get used to it!!

but he always knew with my joints problem that by sitting and staring at the 4 walls wouldnt make my problem go away, not saying working would, but to have something different to think about would be very good for me, both for myself my joints and of course my weight as i wouldnt be picking (i dont
) but it takes my mind off the food!!
so lots for me and not for him really, but there would be he would reap the rewards of me being superfit and healthy!!![msnwink][msnwink][msnwink][msnwink][msnwink]
oh well his loss!![^]